Dinner with the Deities

I went to dinner at the Cheese Cake Factory Saturday night with Brenda and my parents.  Dad had been telling us about the Jesus diet that he had read about.  He said that he had talked to several people who were on it and they were having great success with it.  At one point during dinner, Mom asked Dad if he really needed another piece of bread.  He smiles, lifts the bread in the air and says “Thank you Jesus.”

As he says this, I notice the table next to us is being seated , and one of the people in the group gives him a look.  Now I’ve never met God or Satan, but I distinctly remember meeting Jesus the other day, and I’m pretty sure this is him.  I’m not the type of person to make a big deal about celebrities and ask for autographs, but I couldn’t help overhearing part of there conversation:

Jesus: God, damn that was a long wait.
Dezzie (aka Satan): Hell, and I would have influenced things if I didn’t think you were going to.
William (aka God): Jesus Christ, evil Bitch, all you two ever do is complain. I don’t know why I even try to do any thing nice for you.
Jesus: My God, you blow thing out of proportion. I was just commenting that the wait was long. I’m sure the food is good, but an hour and a half wait is a bit much.
Dezzie: For heaven’s sake, William, relax and try to enjoy yourself.
William: Sorry. Where in God’s name is the waiter?
Waiter: Hello, my name is Peter and I will be taking care of you this evening. Have you eaten at the Cheese Cake Factory before?
All Three: Yes, but not this one.
Waiter: We have a special that’s not on the menu. It’s a white fish from the Mediterranean covered with a blend cheeses from the surrounding region.
Jesus: Do you refer to it as the Cheeses of Nazareth special?
Dezzie and William: [[groan]]
Waiter: Would you like anything other than water to drink?
Jesus (winking to the other two): No, water will be fine, but can you bring us a some wine glasses?

At this point our bill came, so I’m not sure how the rest of the evening went for them.