My friends application to the LA Fire Dept.

One of my best friends is applying for a job with the LA Fire Department.  As part of the application process, they send out questionnaires to people who know the applicant.  Here are samples of some of the questions and how I answered them…

Describe the applicants consumption of alcohol: Man, we used to get shit-faced together. This guy can really put ’em away. If you are looking for someone to party with, this is your guy.

Has the applicant ever done anything illegal: If you didn’t catch us, it didn’t happen.

How does the applicant get along with others: Great, except when he’s trying to piss them off about religion or politics.

Is the applicant trust worthy: You decide. We had a random drug test for the UMSL swimteam, and he knew one of the guys would fail, so he intentionally spilt his sample on the trainer (who was watching us to make sure we didn’t cheat).  During the distraction, I had a chance to give my sample to our friend and then refill his cup as my own. I call that being able to trust your friends.

Would you want the applicant as a fire fighter in your town: Beats the hell out of him starting the fires.

How does the applicant handle stress, give an example: He handles stress great. This one time the cops were chasing us in a helicopter. He kept his cool and helped us all avoid getting caught.