BREAKING NEWS: French Selling Weapons to Aliens

By Arnie Geddon (5/19/2003)

EGI has just learned from one of our more reliable sources within the United Nations that the French government may be selling weapons to extraterrestrials. Although the United Nations is considering sanctions against France, our source says that it is already too late.

Our source informed us that a large contingent of alien spaceships had set out from its home planet more than ten thousand years ago on a mission to take over the Earth. At the time of their departure, the aliens had both superior numbers and weapons. The aliens had not predicted the high birth rate and quick military developments of humans. Due to the length of the trip, humans now possess the upper hand in both weapons and numbers.

The alien command fears to return to their own world unsuccessful and as such has attempted to purchase weapons from earth-based governments. Our source tells us that the aliens initially attempted to purchase the weapons from the United States. Although American defense contractors were eager to deal with the aliens, current export laws prevented the transaction. Russian and China were also in negotiations with the aliens, but the language barrier and low currency exchange rates proved to be too great.

Unfortunately for the Earth, the French government was more than willing to sell their weapons. French President Jacques Chirac was quoted (on the condition of anonymity) – “Of course we are selling arms to the aliens. Our military has no use for weapons and there is no proof that the aliens mean any harm to humanity.”

At the time of this article, the aliens were beginning the invasion in the outback of Australia. When asked about the unusual choice for there invasion, the aliens responded – “We needed an easy victory, and frankly we don’t fully trust the French weapons.”